Are you ready for 2014? When the New Year rolls around we usually have an exhaustive list of New Year’s resolutions we want to fulfill – it’s the time of year where thousands upon thousands of likeminded women like you and other members of “20-30s Women, See & Be Seen, Making a Difference” plan to do more or less of something. New Year’s resolutions usually revolve around quitting vices such as smoking, eating junk or spending or it could be something like hitting the gym to get rid of those extra pounds that have crept up over the last year. If we really analyze our New Year’s resolutions they seem to be frivolous in comparison to other things – they are more of a chore than anything else, and let’s face it, within one or two months they’ll be broken. Looking ahead into your future is vital if you want success and happiness, so how about really doing something that could transform your life once and for all? How about really giving yourself a gift and making resolutions to turn around your love life and find your Mr. Right?
Before you move on to 2014 you need to look back and reflect on the year that has been.
How was 2013 for you?
Did it live up to your expectations?
If you could, what would you change?
These days many women find it difficult to succeed in love. It could be that your ex is still present in your life and you can’t move on, it could be that you’re looking for love in all the wrong places, it could be that you’re not looking at all, or it might even have something to do with how you act around men. Whatever it is, know that you can change it.
You’re the CEO of your own love life and now it is the time for you to take the bull by it horns and change the direction of your life once and for all. After a series of ups and downs, the confident single woman should be among those making some serious resolutions.
The question is: where to start?
1. Go Solo
Many young and confident women near and far have this imbedded fear of going out alone. For 2014, make it one of your priorities to spend more time with yourself. Get to know yourself better – have dinner by yourself or catch a movie alone. You will gain so much more independence, grow in confidence and of course you’ll have less chances of just settling for any man due to loneliness. What’s more, you’ll also attract more men. Men feel intimidated by large groups of women; therefore, you’ll increase your chances of men approaching you more if you’re alone.
2. Look beyond your type
Many women have long extensive lists of what they’re looking for and most usually go for a set type. Be a little bit more open-minded when it comes to dating and don’t dismiss a guy because he doesn’t fit one of your criteria. You could actually be missing out on some great opportunities to find new love by being so close-minded.
3. Enough with the comparisons
One of the biggest mistakes single women make is comparing themselves to their friends and family members who are in steady relationships or are married. This is like self-torture and you’re not doing yourself any favors by doing this, in fact you’re making it worse. You’re making yourself out to be a victim; you’ll end up miserable and nobody wants to hang out with someone who’s always wallowing in their own self-pity. While being in a relationship has many advantages, look at your own advantages of being single – no kids, no extra responsibilities and no problems with the in-laws. When you think about all the positive aspects of your life, you’ll feel uplifted; you’ll smile more and you won’t be bitter. Remember positive energy attracts positive energy and you’ll have more chances of finding somebody who’ll treat you right and add more positivity into your life.
You don’t want to be stuck with a loser who’s pessimistic and brings you down, do you?! I thought so…
Remember, you have the control and the power to make better choices in love, because you’re the CEO of your own life, not anyone else.
4. Learn from the past
What didn’t go the way you wanted to in 2013 and the years before that?
What could be slowing you down, standing in a way or stopping you from finding a decent guy who wanted the same things as you?
Reflecting on the past and analyzing what really worked and didn’t work can help you make better choices in the future.
5. Stop being afraid
It’s natural to feel apprehensive when entering a new relationship. But just because you’ve been burned before, doesn’t necessarily mean it’s going to happen again. Actually, if you really are in charge of your love life, you’ll ensure it will never happen again. Start loving yourself more and don’t shut out men because you fear being hurt. If need be, create a positive mantra for yourself, repeat affirmations and remind yourself of how great you are. If you continue to live in fear, your life will remain the same, you’ll follow the same old pattern as the previous years and all of what you’ve achieved so far would have been a complete waste of time. Love thyself and look at your fears as challenges. Nobody got anywhere in the world without taking a few risks.
2014 will be the year for you to find love, but only if you let it. If you start looking at things differently and realistically, you’ll have all the luck in love you want plus a lot more. When you fill your life with happiness, you’ll see other aspects change too. Love is a wonderful thing and you deserve nothing but the best.
This blog post is written and shared by Polina Solda, a relationship expert and professional coach. You can sign up for her upcoming live workshop “Find Love in 2014” here: http://skl.sh/19L1Hr2
Dating Expert and Certified Coach
New York, NY
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