When you are dating someone, or even in a serious relationship, a well placed compliment will show how much you enjoy being with that special someone. Most women love being complimented, particularly by someone she might be romantically interested in.
Because giving compliments is a good way to show your date that you are paying attention to them you have to know when to use them. Don’t get carried away with the compliments because you do not want to overdo it. You want them to know you are paying attention but you don’t want to come off as needy or desperate. Nothing sends up the desperation flag quicker than a whole slew of cheesy compliments.
You want your compliment to put your date in the right frame of mind. You want them to be accepting of you and who you are. How you compliment should be an extension of who you are, which will help them get to know you better.
Now the question becomes, what do I compliment them on? That depends on you and your date. If you are meeting for the first time find two or three things that you are really attracted to when you first see them. Now don’t just blurt these out, store them away for later on in your date. After you’ve spent a little time with them go ahead and compliment them on whatever you noticed first about them. It is also important that you say it like you mean it. This will show them that you are attracted to them and that you are paying attention to them.
If you have been on more than a few dates and know this person better than finding the right compliment will be easier, and sometimes harder. You can’t use the same compliments over and over again; you have to notice new things about them, or something they may have changed. Say a new hair style or highlights, or how they are dressed. Let them know how good they look so they know that the time and effort they have put into whatever they have done was worth it.
Let’s turn this around and look at it from the other side. When you go on a date the one thing you are really looking for is a sort of acceptance. And being complimented is something that can make you feel very good about not only yourself but also your date. It means they like what they see, and physical attraction is very important when dating. It also means that the effort you have put forth to impress them has paid off and that can be a very good feeling. That feeling is what you hope to create for the person you are going on the date with.
Remember, a good compliment can be a powerful thing if used right. Use them as needed and be sincere. A well placed compliment can be a great ice breaker and can lead to a truly wonderful date.
Dating Expert and Certified Coach
New York, NY
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