DATINGRELATIONSHIPS

I have a question for you.

What are your plans (that involve meeting and interacting with other people) this weekend?

Does it sound like this, “Attending an art exhibition on my own (I often go out to events alone, because it’s easier to meet new people), doing crossfit (lots of men there!), meeting with friends for dinner, going on two dates, and volunteering at a soup kitchen”?

Or, does it sound more like this, “Staying at home (cleaning, doing laundry, ironing, cooking and, after getting exhausted, bingeing on Netflix), going to yoga (it’s all women) and then visiting my best friend (she’s single and not dating)”?

Based on your response, I can predict how likely you are to meet a good, available man this weekend.

Do your plans maximize your chances to meet him?

If not, what do you need to say “No” to?

For example, if you work full-time and spend a half-day on the weekend cleaning your apartment and doing laundry, what are you missing out on?

Think about all the possible places you could go, all the things you could do, and all the people you could meet INSTEAD.

Look, back when I was single and dating (while going to graduate school full-time and working as an unpaid intern at the United Nations part-time), I didn’t have that extra money to hire a cleaning lady.

But I got one anyway, because the cost of not doing that was too high. It may sound counter- intuitive, but the reality is this:

We all have 24 hours in a day, and we have the freedom of choice about where to invest our limited time and energy.

You could invest (not spend!) $100 on a cleaning lady, so that you could invest 4-5 hours of your time in enjoying life — and possibly meeting your dream man.

If you decide not to invest in a cleaning lady and do the housework yourself, it comes with a huge potential opportunity lost–you may think you “saved” $100., but you also lost 4-5 hours of your life that you can never get back.

Those might be the very hours that could start an epic love story you would later tell your friends and family, about how you and your dream man found each other.

A story like Leslie’s — she met her future husband by going on an all-day ski trip to Vermont, instead of her typical Sunday, going to her yoga class of all women, having brunch with her girlfriends and–here it is again–cleaning her apartment the rest of the day.

So, what’s more important?

This is just an example of how shifting your mindset about priorities and decisions on where to invest your precious time, energy and money can change the results you create.

You may say something like “Wait, Polina. Even if I delegate and outsource cleaning my home, it doesn’t guarantee that I’ll meet someone.

True, it doesn’t. But it significantly expands and maximizes your chances of meeting your man.

And what can be guaranteed is that while you’re scrubbing floors, you’re definitely not going to meet your man. Zero chance of that, to be specific.

Even Cinderella, if you remember, delegated her household chores to the fairy Godmother while she went out to a ball.

So, the first step to ensure you make the most out of your weekends is to separate everything you do into two basic categories: 1) gets me closer to my man, or 2) keeps me away from meeting my man.

Choose to invest your time and energy into the first category today and this weekend, so that you can tap into opportunities you haven’t had before.